I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
Looking for things to spread butter on. Found men's briefs in garbage can. Lost insurance card. Summer has finally arrived
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
I stole us four large rolls of toilet paper from the hotel carts. I feel like the breadwinner in this relationship
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
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