6:33 AM: I'm drunk at this time of morning.
Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
he woke me up at 3 am to ask me where my plunger, a towel, and staples were. i'm afraid to go into my bathroom.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
You overflowed the toilet cuz you tried to flush apples. you said they were singing too loudly
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
I woke up spooning with a broom that someone taped a mustache too..i need to stop starting my nights by drinking "hangover" wine.
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
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