i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
I mistook a propane tank for a keg.
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
she said "the two best ways to sober up are to nurse someone or give a blowjob" and im gonna go along with it.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
My boss's toddler just went through my bag and found your vibrator...you owe me a drink.
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