ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
Girls are like M&M's, once the lights go out you can't tell the difference.
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
In fairness you've introduced me to a lot of people I've only met once, for like 5 seconds, while drunk
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
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