Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
This house was built for laser tag.
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
Ya know, sometimes when he kisses me in public I want to scream "HE DRIVES A PORSCHE!" so people watching understand that I don't have low standards, I'm just very materialistic.
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
The best part about this city is obvious. Someone saw me crouching by a bar pissing in my leftover Panera bread bowl and they just winked.
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
Seriously. I'm like, "Wait, we are actually talking about physics in the middle of sex and its ACTUALLY erotic because you're so fucking intelligent I'm turned on?"
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
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