Microwave minutes are longer than normal minutes.
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
Someone just said “I need to use up this money before I’m tits up under the dirt” so I think I’m going to start using that in my daily vocabulary.
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
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