Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
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When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
Yeah man it sucked balls. People on the bus probably thought I was fucking crazy. I was fetal position, taking up two seats with no shame whilst simultaneously panting.
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
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I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
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