Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
I hate it when you make eye contact with someone bcs you are about to make fun of them and they take it as a hint to come hit on you.
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
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