I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
I fell asleep while we were Skyping and woke up to his balls bouncing in front of the camera while he sang "Wakey Wakey!" over and over again. Merryfuckingchristmas.
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??