I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
I'm jealous of your bromance
Whatcha textin bout Willis?
You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
i totally just wrapped her wedding gift in tin foil. These are the skills 2 bachelor's degrees have given me.
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
Randomize
