She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
I didn't have toilet paper until 20 minutes ago. But I have champagne. Priorities.
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
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