So he says "lean over this" which is a chain across the doorway, held into the wall with bolts. I do. Then he puts his weight on top of me to try and get it in.
It breaks. We fall.
I now have a broken nose, a concussion, and an infected, split lip. Why do I have the worst luck in guys?
Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
25 People Confess The Biggest Betrayal They Have Ever Faced
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
Penises. Penises everywhereeeeeeeee. Penis ratio is sooo disproportionate. I can't NOT get laid tonight.
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
25 Odd Things These Pathetic People Do For Enjoyment
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
Dude. My knees have no hair on them and they're bruised. My thigh is killing me. I have about 1000 texts to about 5 exes which I horribly regret. I have pictures of my own penis on my phone. I can't find my iPad. And I have work in an hour.
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
Not gonna lie I just got drunk and started doing applications because I know I'm going into work tomorrow still drunk