glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
I think I deserve the nobel peace prize for discovering that one should smoke before drinking instead of drinking before smoking.
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
I'm sober. Being kissed by a chick with a llama puppet. Shoot me now.
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
...I can smell the alcohol on your breath through that text
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
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