You can bone my sister, but I will end our friendship if you write 'LOLERS' one more time at the end of your texts.
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
I just stood up and am wasted. I think I just admitted to my mom that I am trying to fuck everyone in New York because they're skinny and ethnically ambiguous. Meanwhile, happy hour isn't over yet.
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
Randomize
