I just walked into the kitchen and my dad was having this uber serious convo
With himself
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
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