: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
Listening to my boss get blown in the next room by a male bartender from the gay bar. And watching pawnstars. Tell me I'm not the best wingman ever.
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
I convinced her that there were two p's in Chipotle - the 2nd one was silent.
No one needs to know about the barren wasteland that is my vag. Sometimes i visualize my cervix rocking back and forth wondering where everybody went.
I just pictured that. It's reading a book.
Randomize
