Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
Randomize
