He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
Just flooded the bathroom while masturbating in the shower. Managed to squeege most of it up. Desperately need to get laid.
And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
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