Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
My dog just threw up a condom. Sorry for accusing you of not wearing one, I found it now.
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
Our livers are going to hate us.
It's okay, they're regenerative. God wanted this.
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
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