yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
Just threw up in nordstroms while shopping for moms bday with dad. He distracted workers for me. No more tequila
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
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