..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
Sorry about all the noise last night. We were trying to break bottles by kicking soccer balls at them. If it's any consolation, there's shattered glass and blood all over my kitchen.
She came home wasted 'not wantin to talk about it' so for revenge I woke her up with a dutch oven and she puked all over me and the bed. I can't win.
Dude I told you 22 year olds shouldn't get married
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
I want to let you in on my two latest life goals. Have a photograph of me squirting whipped cream into a midget's mouth, and have sex on a roof.
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
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