Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
He thought the strainer was a giant bowl to puke in.
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
why the fuck is there hamburger meat in the toaster. i repeat: WHY THE FUCK IS THERE HAMBURGER MEAT IN MY NEW TOASTER
Just had to read the instructions to my microwave. How am I so high?
Randomize
