and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
Woke up this morning naked, wrapped in a bath mat with a wad of singles on the table. I'm calling it a win.
my vag sweat smells like doritos
so now that we're not dating you have to stop sending shit like this to me okay?
You know you're too drunk when you start calling people out for unfollowing you on social networks.
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize