so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
I'm drunk at The Bachelor casting call in Cleveland
I cherish every text you send me
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
I need to wake up with a beard between my thighs more often, I'm a fucking saint.
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
This couple is walking their pig around campus
Taking out my recycling and 90% of it is alcohol and cat food. I am judging myself.
Just so you know sleeping with you is like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
That's the most romantic thing I've ever heard
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
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