p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
Current status: Finding an unwrapped portion of Subway sandwich in my purse at the pharmacy counter & picking pieces of tomato off my wallet while the pharmacist watches disdainfully.
Did you offer her some?
If only. Current status: Not that clever.
I just hope the day something happens to me my phone just dies, like literally died and will never turn on ever again. I feel like God owes me that much.
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
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