that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
WHY IS MY CAR MISSING A DOOR YOU BITCH
budget cuts
YOU CANT BLAME EVERYTHING YOU DO WHILE DRUNK ON BUDGET CUTS
budget cuts are serious business
He was handing out home-made business cards that read "finger slamming bitches since 1986"\n
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
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