Do you need to be saved?
No I think I'm God
Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
I was the only open register tonight and I just sold condoms and chocolate frosting to the ex..
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
Randomize
