OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
Either allow it in a formal toast or i will drunkenly tell your in-laws while i'm dancing on their table. either way, the truth is coming out
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
Oh god. Standing was a rash decision
I made it to Starbucks to do work and I've just been sitting here with my head on the table for 30 minutes...
When I say I took advantage of you when you were drunk, I mean that I convinced you to let me paint cute little panda bears on all of your toenails.
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
WHY IS THERE NO EMOJI FOR "FUCK MY MOM JUST SAW MY SEX BRUISES?!"
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
Randomize
