in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
Woke up at 4:30am to my little brother shaking me. Apparently I fell asleep naked on my kitchen table waiting for the toaster to pop. 2 years of college completed and i still havent learned my drinking limit...
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
Also 70% sure I have a splinter on my eyelid from last night
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
Turns out naked yoga wasn't a pickup line. I feel betrayed.
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