apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
It made me feel like I need a reality show of my life so I could go back and watch the episodes to figure out how I got from the trunk of the car to my neighbors tree house...
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
Where's the Hot Mess Express headed tonight?
I hope that's not the new nickname for my friends and me.
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
Randomize
