I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
Turns out he's not a Doctor Who fan, I mumbled Alons-y as I went down on him. He asked who Alan was. No more drunk sex for me!
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
He called me for phone sex. Do you know how hard it is to fake an orgasm, and play Candy Crush at the same time?
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
Randomize
