Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
this is getting really bad. i thought the chandelier in the dining room was one of those claws from the claw games in an arcade and i spent the past five minutes jumping left to right so the claw wouldn't grab me
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
All these girls I talk to are like I've never had a hangover and I'm like you don't drink right here let me show you
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
not ubering you a puppy
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
Never underestimate the power of titties
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
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