We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
I just spent all my babysitting money on red cups and beer.
People still let you watch their kids?
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
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