Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
I've never felt more disgusting in my life. And I'm including the time I snuggled that homeless woman in the puddle of my whiskey vomit.
The creepiest man is serenading me at the bar right now. I had about a quarter of a drink left and the bartender just walked over and filled it with vodka and walked away laughing.
It's all part of my master plan: have him buy me all I can eat pizza and all I can drink beer AND THEN tell him there was no spark and we're better off as friends.
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize
