Jerry, you need to find god
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
My mom just woke me up with a cowboy hat and sunglasses on. It's 7 am and she's drunk.
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
Randomize
