it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
i'm gonna start fucking more girls with asthma. help feed my ego.
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
Right as the plane left the gate the brownies kicked in. I dont think the guy next to me appreciated my engine noises as we took off
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
Randomize
