oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
her wearing orange crocs at the bar was definitely a great form of contraception
My gut is currently telling me that Jesus did not intend for us to eat shrimp pad thai on Easter
Is this a considering it or regretting it text?
I just shit out what feels like an entire shrimp with claws and all. You tell me.
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
Bring me that man meat
He asked me if I want to play Uber Driver, is this some new sex game or is he drunk and asking for a ride home?
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
Randomize
