He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
I wasted my skinny years on you. The least you can do is high five me at the bar
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
Can I just say I love that you have a kegorator on your wedding registry?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
Life without a bra equals bliss.
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
I brought an already opened bag of trail mix from home to snack on today. Some motherfucker ate all the m&ms out of it. I hate my roommates
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
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