You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
This is much more drunk than i was intending for a wednesday
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
I left myself a note saying 'buy a hamster but not an orange one like this pen'
omg so drunk
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
Randomize
