I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
I told her I'd give her some of the cream I was using so she didn't get my warts. That's when I realized I was too drunk.
You woke up in the middle of the night and told me we won the sweepstakes, the penis sweepstakes.
I have surprise drugs for everyone
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
True strength comes from lack of pants
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