so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
never play flip cup with pint glasses
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
So my mom wants me to come swim with dolphins with my little sisters in October. I'm not sure how to tell her I saw a "when dolphins attack" special when I was rolling and am now terrified of them.
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
Also, making a white Russian with butterscotch schnapps instead of vodka is probably the best decision I've made in my entire college career.
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
Randomize
