its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
Looking for things to spread butter on. Found men's briefs in garbage can. Lost insurance card. Summer has finally arrived
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
We left around 4am, just after you laid down on your front lawn to take a piss. After 15 mins I said "dude are you still peeing?" you replied "Nope, just laying here with my dick out."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
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