Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
I know it was you because you're the only person I know who gets drunk and craves soup.
Soup is delicious
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
Randomize
