There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
My mom opened up my bank statement today....my first alcohol intervention class is at 7:30am tomorrow.
I'll have party bus drop you off in the morning.
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
You don't understand!!! BACON ROSES!!! Why are you not more excited?!
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
And if you put this on Facebook, I will drop live cockroaches in your mouth while you sleep and then smother you with a pillow.
You always say the most romantic things
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
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