So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
If i off myself, it'll be in a lobster costume in the hot tub with butter...
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
After you vomited on the patrol car, you thanked the officer for helping you up off the ground. I don't think you realized you were being arrested.
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
Randomize
