How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
Public service announcement: if you would like to continue receiving blow jobs, a 25% increase in fuck-giving will be expected immediately, and you're expected to give an actual flying fuck at least once a week. Brought to you by the ad council.
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
Look, if a guy shows up at your house. He's short, name is Logan, has weird vertical hair, let him in, give him food, and a place to stay. He's on a ver important mission. And I am he. as he is me and we are all together. And we are the eggman, goo goo gajoob.
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