Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
Every morning i wake up and check his twitter like a horoscope
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
Randomize
