Dude I wish you were here. I'm innthe back seat and it looks like outer space and everything feels like rice. idk. wtf.
drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
Who died my cat blue again?
Randomize
