What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
In two separate occurrences, I could have avoided getting my heart broken, and chlamydia, all with a left swipe.
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
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