Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
I didn't know it was possible to throw up mid-sneeze.
How does, "Im sorry I was such an intoxicated bitch, I didn't mean anything I said" sound as an apology.
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
It's not christmas until we're acting sober in front of grandma
Randomize
