i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
It was the night of "what the fuck have you done with my daughter and where is she" texts from mom...
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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