And I just remember seeing him for the first time and being like, who is this ape of a man? Like legit he could be the missing link
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
Ugh I just wanna make an announcement like: Attention high school classmates: if we haven't spoken in 5 years, we don't need to start now. Please be on your way
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
Woo is fucking right, dude. Vodka night tonight. Honestly, every night pretty much seeems like vodka night lately. My liver wants to move out of my body like I gave it an eviction notice.
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
Randomize
